"What is this thing, anyway?" said the Dean, inspecting the implement in his hands. "It's called a shovel," said the Senior Wrangler. "I've seen the gardeners use them. You stick the sharp end in the ground. Then it gets a bit technical."
No one was avoiding him, it was just that an apparent random Brownian motion was gently moving everyone away.
People have believed for hundreds of years that newts in a well mean that the water's fresh and drinkable, and in all that time never asked themselves whether the newts got out to go to the lavatory.
He'd never realized that, deep down inside, what he really wanted to do was make things go splat.
DROP THE SCYTHE, AND TURN AROUND SLOWLY.
Five exclamation marks, the sure sign of an insane mind.
It is traditional, when loading wire trolleys, to put the most fragile items at the bottom.
No matter how fast light travels it finds the darkness has always got there first, and is waiting for it.
I EXPECT, he said, THAT YOU COULD MURDER A PIECE OF CHEESE?
On the fabled hidden continent of Xxxx, somewhere near the rim, there is a lost colony of wizards who wear corks around their pointy hats and live on nothing but prawns.
"Chap with a whip got as far as the big sharp spikes last week," said the low priest.
"You know," said Windle, "it's a wonderful afterlife."
WHAT CAN THE HARVEST HOPE FOR, IF NOT FOR THE CARE OF THE REAPER MAN?
- "Have you any last words?"
- YES. I DON'T WANT TO GO.
- "Well. Succinct, anyway."
Mrs Evadne Cake was a medium, verging on small.
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