The L-Space Web: Filks

It's a Dogs Life


Newsgroups: alt.fan.pratchett
Subject: [F] [I]'m feeling inspired this weekend, aren't I?
From: MegaMole
Date: Sun, 29 Nov 1998 13:42:56 +0000

This came to me while I was oggling the takeaway curries in Waitrose...
You need to imagine a steady 12-bar blues chord progression, probably in something like D minor.

Here goes... (howwwlll!)

Now I woke up this morning with Thoughts all through my head
I thought I was a dog but I'm a beggar's brain instead
My eyes see black and white now but my nose is smelling red -
It's a dog's life - I've got those Gaspode blues.

(dum duh dum duh DUM duh doobee doo dum duh doo WAAAH...)

People give me odd looks when I say "Woof, woof, beg"
My only love experience was to shag a postman's leg -
I stained the poor man's trousers and I ruined his best shoes...
It's a dog's life - I've got those Gaspode blues.

(dum duh dum duh DUM duh doobee doo dum duh doo WAAAH...)

It's hard to be a Wonder Dog when you don't look too good -
I found that happened last time, when I saved that Holy Wood
'Cos no-one else gets patted when it's Laddie's neighbourhood:
It's a dog's life - I've got those Gaspode blues.

(Good boy Laddie!)
(dum duh dum duh DUM duh doobee doo dum duh doo WAAAH...)

Now my best skin diseases come from humans or from sheep;
I've even got me Licky End - it makes those bitches weep -
And I get fresh new aftershave from every rubbish heap...
It's a dog's life - I've got those Gaspode blues.

(dum duh dum duh DUM duh doobee doo dum doo doo WAAAH...)
[harmonica or piano break; howling solo]

Mad Fido, Dog Guild Barker, was a poodle with some clout.
He threatened my mate Angua and that's not what it's about:
So I used my special Power and "BAD DOG!" was my way out:
It's a dog's life - I've got those Gaspode blues.

(dum duh dum duh DUM duh doobee doo dum duh doo WAAAH...)

So next time you Smell Foul Ole Ron, don't listen to him swear -
Just look for me - the small grey cur with a very hangdog air -
'Cos when my master lost his mind he'd nothing left to lose...
It's a dog's life - I've got those Gaspode blues.

(dum duh dum duh DUM duh doobee doo dum doo doo WAAAH...)

'N that's all.

Woof, woof, biscuit.


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