The L-Space Web: Filks

Fsck You!


From: Patrick Dersjant
Newsgroups: alt.fan.pratchett
Subject: Re: [I] Micro$oft $cum - Filk
Date: Tue, 22 Aug 2000 13:35:20 +0200

a - a scroll of news from Medusa.
Read it? y
> Eric Jarvis
>
> > Win 3.1 was user friendly...I actually vaguely liked it
> >
> > Win 98 is user patronising
> >
>
> Totally agreed, although I think we could crosspost the 'we hate Win 98'
> campaign to the 'we hate the paperclip office assistant' and have a mass
> hanging for all these useless little add-ons that do nothing save for
> irritate the user. I don't think there's anything more infuriating than
> reinstalling Win 98 only to be greeted with their 'funky' intro music.
> Grrrrrr...

Nothing is as infuriating as Win98 anyway. And Office. Put it like this: yesterday I had to perform some formatting in Word. I use a macro package for this, but time after time the bloody things failed. I changed the text, checked the styles, reloaded the document, restarted Word. To no avail. A colleague then came with a (seemingly) stupid suggestion: reboot Windows. I did. After that, it immediately worked fine.

Grrrr... is not enough. I had to vent. It cost me a bloody day of work that I would have spent on something productive. I was... quite upset. Therefore I would like to extend my profound apologies to Alanis Morisette, but her song just fitted too well and was played at the wrong moment:

Fuck you, TTTO 'Thank you'

How 'bout getting off of these gpf errors
How 'bout stopping to run when just started up
How 'bout that mindboggling 'active desktop'
How 'bout that so called 'plug and play' shite

CHORUS
Fuck you Microsoft
Fuck you Office
Fuck you bloody paperclip
Fuck you Windows
Fuck you Powerpoint
Fuck you Fuck you blue screen

How 'bout me not blaming you for everything
How 'bout me enjoying computers for once
How 'bout how good it feels to finally wipe you
How 'bout nuking it all one at a time

CHORUS

The moment I let go of it was
The moment I got more than I could handle
The moment I jumped off of it was
The moment I touched down

How 'bout no longer being masochistic
How 'bout remembering your dignity
How 'bout unabashedly using vi now
How 'bout not equating 'print' with crashing

CHORUS

Patrick


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