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Lilliburlero


From: Gideon Hallett
Newsgroups: alt.fan.pratchett
Subject: [I]Rant w.r.t. Sect. 28
Date: 8 Feb 2000 11:22:23 GMT

OK, folks; you have been warned; my normally fluffy self is decidedly pissed off about the events in the Lords yesterday.

Exactly *what* was the whole issue decided on?

a) It was decided upon the blatantly irrational prejudices of a couple of hundred nitwits who couldn't string a logical argument together to save their lives.

(Lord Russell was one of the few vaguely sensible people to speak yesterday;

...Being homosexual, he said, was no more a "choice" than being right or left-handed. But most gays saw section 28 as a "badge of inequality, and if they listened to this debate, they would be unlikely to change their minds.")

It's a great shame that the Lords don't have to produce things like logic and evidence to argue with; if they did it would have the advantage of doing away with the need for various of that house having to stand on their heads to say anything audible...that means *you*, Lord Waddington, and *you* Baroness Young.

b) It was supported by the great and good of various religious orders displaying hypocrisy and intolerance of a staggering degree.

Which of the various religious orders hasn't demanded tolerance of their faith as part of a multicultural society? - And which are the first group to start getting intolerant when it conflicts with *their* sacred cows?

(A tempting suggestion; if they wish to be intolerant in the name of their religion, then let us be intolerant of their religion; I'm sure they'll empathize more closely with the oppressed after a few clergy get toasted...burn a bishop today! Immolate an imam! Roast a rabbi!

No, I don't seriously mean it; it's not a solution, but *damn it all*, why are non-heterosexuals expected to turn the other cheek to overt abuse and intolerance in the name of a religion that tells people to be tolerant?)

And, to add the final insult, the Scum and the Daily Wail are sporting particularly odious and smug front pages about it today. These are the papers which represent the vanguard of the homophobes; witness the glee with which they pounce on any 'outing' and the way the Scum says that Britain is run by a 'gay mafia'. These are the papers which represent the worst intolerance of all; and try to portray it as something held by 'the silent majority'.

Well damn them. Damn them all to the blackest pit.

There are thousands of screwed-up and miserable kids out there getting picked on by their classmates for 'being different' over something they really can't help; God only knows how many of them have committed suicide over the years.

I live in hope of the day arriving when castigating people for being gay is about as welcome as making Sambo jokes or arguing that women are no more qualified to vote than horses.

I am angry. And here's my response, to the tune of Lilliburlero;

1.
Baroness Young 'as made a decree
Silly old tóruidhe[1], heart black as tar
That we'll worship the family
Silly old tóruidhe, heart black as tar

Chorus:

Tóruidhes, clergy, homophobe fools
Trying to set the agenda in schools
Squealing, shouting, Bible-clouting
Forcing us all to live by their rules.

2.
Ho! there's a Cardinal, in a pulpit
Bigoted clergy, heart black as tar
Telling us all that gays are just shit
Bigoted clergy, heart black as tar

Chorus.

3.
Loudly the Mail takes up the strain,
Damnable Dacre, heart black as tar
Showing no mercy and having no brain
Damnable Dacre, heart black as tar

Chorus.

4.
Bovver boots on, the Sun starts to yell,
Parasite Yelland, heart black as tar
Raising a ruckus because it will sell
Parasite Yelland, heart black as tar

Chorus.

5.
Rabbis and imams all speak with one voice,
Hypocrite preachers, heart black as tar
The people shall ne'er be allowed a free choice!
Hypocrite preachers, heart black as tar

Chorus.

6.
For all of our life is theirs to dictate
Moralist morons, hearts black as tar
Just as Tory MPs are all married and straight!
Moralist morons, hearts black as tar

Chorus.

Gideon.

(please note: this is a satire...)

[1] pronounced 'Tory' - it's the Irish for a highway robber (and is where the word comes from.)


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